Pro-Ana: acceptance versus promotion of EDs [15/10/2024]

Pro-ana is a term you may have heard of before: it's the promotion of anorexia nervosa, an eating disorder characterised by restriction of food, intense fear of gaining weight and body image disturbance (BID).

Whilst that may seem like an easy to understand definition of pro-ana, the reality is much more complicated -- the way the term is used differs between pro-ana groups, with some using it as not for the promotion of anorexia, but the acceptance of it, and other groups promoting anorexia as desirable, just like the definition of the term would suggest.

In this essay, I'll explain the different types of groups: pro-recovery and pro-ana, how these communities become harmful and how these groups come to be from longing for community, and will also provide my personal opinion as someone who struggles with eating.

The spectrum of "pro-ana" groups

Pro-ana has been used to describe many groups with different stances on anorexia. I think that, before going through the different usages of the term, I'll explain pro-recovery. Pro-recovery groups will promote recovering from anorexia and having healthier eating habits, whilst pro-ana can range from anything not being about recovery. To further show how wide the spectrum of pro-ana is, one side could acknowledge anorexia as a mental illness, but provide support for those who don't feel ready to recover whilst the opposite end of the spectrum could deny it as being a mental illness, say it's a "lifestyle choice" and see it as desirable. So, the former is more of a pro-acceptance, whilst the latter is what I'll refer to as "true pro-ana", as it's the purest form and exactly what the definition of pro-ana is. So, in short, the different types of anorexia support are:

1. Pro-recovery, acknowledging anorexia as a mental illness and promoting recovery.

2. Pro-ana, which doesn't promote recovery and ranges from:

• A: Acknowledging anorexia as a mental illness, but providing support for those who aren't ready to recover (pro-acceptance)
• B: Denying anorexia as a mental illness, and promotes it (true pro-ana)

So despite pro-acceptance and true pro-ana being vastly different, they're still pro-ana as they don't actively promote recovery.

Why is pro-ana so vast in definition?

Pro-ana is a confusing term -- it has different meanings with context of the group and even the individual with an ED. The reason for this most likely comes from the fact that it's a contrast to pro-recovery.

Pro-recovery groups post things made to inspire recovering from anorexia, talking about progress with overcoming the mental illness, etc. These groups are going to attract a certain type of person, someone recovering or about to start recovering from anorexia. But this excludes the many people suffering from anorexia who aren't recovering, which may be due to not feeling ready to recover or being in denial about having a serious mental illness. This why pro-ana would exist: a space for anyone who isn't recovering to have support and understanding.

Where pro-ana becomes dangerous

Whilst a space for people suffering from anorexia to feel understood seems fine in concept, it has a tendency to fester unhealthy and dangerous ideology, which is why it's the subject of controversy. So how does it become twisted and dangerous?

Because the range of people who don't fit into pro-recovery groups is vast, the content in pro-ana spaces is just as wide. Those who fit into pro-acceptance are most likely making vent posts about their ED, whilst someone who's in heavy denial about being mentally ill -- true pro-ana -- is more likely to make posts encouraging anorexia and heavy restriction of food and "mealspo". Because of the content encouraging the disorder, even those who know the disorder is dangerous can have their condition worsened. This is how it becomes an echo-chamber, encouraging anorexia even if unintentional.

A sense of community through pro-ana

But if those who know anorexia isn't desirable are becoming encouraged, wouldn't they just leave the site? Why do they continue to stay in a place worsening their condition? It's for one reason: community. Let's be honest: most mental illnesses seem strange and sometimes even silly to those who aren't afflicted with it. This is why so many people enjoy watching Hoarders, because the mental state is peculiar and hard to understand. This makes suffering from a mental illness alienating, and people suffering from anorexia are no exception. If an anorexic person can't be understood by someone without an eating disorder, they'll seek out other people with eating disorders to feel a sense of understanding and support. For many anorexics, pro-ana spaces are their only way to feel a sense of community and support from others, even if these spaces are making their condition worse. To ask someone already in a bad mental state to leave behind their community could be dangerous and make the suffering person feel out of control, which would most likely also worsen the disorder as anorexia is rooted in a desire to have control.

Conclusion

Pro-ana is a difficult topic, and has many nuances and grey sides. It can be incredibly harmful, as any group made up of people with mental illnesses can become, but it can also provide a sense of understanding and support for those who're already alienated.

I believe that the good, bad and grey sides should be equally acknowledged, and not have all attention directed towards to the negatives. Whilst I think these groups should be avoided due to the inevitable dangerous content which will spring up, most discussion on the groups come from a black-and-white perspective which focuses on the toxicity of the sites and ignores why people join them in the first place, making these discussions an unsympathetic view on the isolating reality of having an ED.

Pro-ana is an echo chamber of content encouraging unhealthy diets, but behind this echo chamber is a community which simply wanted to feel understood by others similar to them -- and this intent to be an understanding community, whilst never redeeming the terrible nature of these groups, shouldn't be forgotten or dismissed when talking about pro-ana.

The problems with AI "art" and writing [08/10/2024]

AI writing and "art" is the subject of controversy and there is quite a bit of discussion around it. Some see no issues with utilising it whilst some despise it and claim that it's "theft". I fall into the latter, and in this blog post, I'll explain how generative AI works and why I dislike it.

First, let's talk about AI being used in writing. The most dangerous and interesting case of this is self-published foraging books on Amazon. These books give vague descriptions of plants and fungi whilst failing to mention what regions you can find them in, making the guides an accident waiting to happen. If you want to find out more, I recommend the linked video. But how could an AI, something supposedly much more intelligent than all of us, be so wrong? It's because the generative AI used to write (e.g. ChatGPT) gains its information from the internet. It scans pages of info, mixes everything it finds and re-words it. So, if pages of the internet contain misinformation, AI will make a lot of mistakes, some being harmful.

Now what about AI generated images, also called AI "art"? Many artists hate AI "art" and for good reason. Similar to AI writing, it takes things from the internet and mashes it all into one, and what it's taking is real artists' work without their consent. In short, it's theft and there's no denying it. There was a massive controversy with DeviantArt's generative AI because the AI stole from millions of artists without their permission. There are also those who call themselves "AI artists", people who do nothing but type a prompt into a program to get a generated image made from the stolen artwork of others, and then claim the generated image is "art" they made. Actual artists are annoyed that this is happening, and rightfully so.

So, from all of this, it's safe to say that AI isn't just factually incorrect at times but also plagiarises others. It's irritating, but I don't think AI will take over the world like some believe it will (at least with how it is now): AI generates things from the internet, a place full of knowledge and human stupidity, so AI is just as dumb as the average person, with the only real difference being its pretentious wording.

I hate SH being glamorised [11/09/2024]

This post is mainly a rant, but why the fuck are people on the internet obsessed with romanticising self harm? It's either people bragging about cutting themselves or giving fictional characters weird and frankly, creepy headcanons to do with SH.

First, let's talk about the headcanons. I've noticed fans of Bungo Stray Dogs doing this with the character Dazai. If you haven't seen BSD, Dazai is a character who's severely depressed and has attempted suicide many times. Fans seem to enjoy making strange hcs up to do with his mental health, such as "Only shows Chuuya his SH scars" (real headcanon I once came across) and things in a similar vain to that. Do I have to explain what's messed up with that? I wish that, for the first time ever, an internet fanbase can talk about a fictional character with poor mental health in an intelligent and respectful manner. Things such as the mentioned headcanon is insulting to people who do struggle with SH and/or their mental health.

So at least that was just a character, not a real person. Well things are going to get more serious, because we're going to talk about Tumblr.

Why is Tumblr a cesspit of the worst things on the internet? Well, Tumblr communities are no stranger to promoting dangerous things such as anorexia and bulimia, so of course there are people who glamorise self harm. On Tumblr, if you go to the search bar and type in "sel" without clicking anything, one of the tags you will see show up is "self h@rm". This tag has 21K followers. I accidently clicked on this tag before when typing in sel as the abbreviation for Serial Experiments Lain. The "self h@rm" tag on Tumblr is scarily easy to stumble onto.

Anyway, what's on the tag? People giving advice on how to stop self harming? Of course not. On this tag I've came across photos of people's cuts, self deprecating humour to do with their sh problem, people showing off their blade collection and people asking for advice on the best ways to self mutilate. This tag genuinely feels disturbing and eerie, and this is coming from someone who's near bullet-proof when it comes to horror. There could be a near innocent post of someone showing a small, hinged box they found at a thrift store, but underneath there'll be text saying that they plan to hide their blades in the box. In the comments of posts showing off blade collections, you'll see people commenting, asking how each blade is and which one the poster recommends. It's horrible.

It's not just the "self h@rm" tag -- I've came across posts like that on the emo tag and other tags for alternative subcultures, alt bands, etc. I've been in the MCR fandom for more than two years, and whilst most of the fans are nice people, there is a small, but noticeable amount which glamorise mental health problems. I think it's a real problem, especially when a lot of people in these spaces struggle with their mental health and have the band as their comfort.

Now onto self harm itself, besides the glamorisation. If you hurt yourself or you even get urges to hurt yourself, please tell someone. Tell anyone. I'm one to talk, but if you're mutilating yourself you need to seek help immediately. A large majority of the time SH occurs with mental disorders, such as depression, anxiety disorders, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, PTSD and bipolar disorder. People who experience depersonalisation also have a tendency to hurt themselves. Whilst you may not be aware of exactly why you self-harm, it's usually done as a coping mechanism. You could be doing it as a release for bottled emotions and stress, or it could be to relieve a feeling of numbness. Even if you think you don't need help, hurting yourself is a major sign of there being something else seriously wrong, so talk to someone as soon as possible.

So that's all, have a good day and don't post harmful content.